Speaking up takes courage, whether it is asking for what you want at a restaurant or asking for what you want in life. With the full moon today (representing endings, closing a chapter celebrating the fullness and richness in the cycles of life), it seemed a fitting time to be daring about 5 things we each want to speak up about in hopes of ending misconceptions (if there were any):
1. The concept of passing time is flexible. Having just returned home after weeks away, I am acutely aware of how much our perception of time can shift. Flying, dragging, bending - it's all a matter of perspective. There are moments that seem to last a lifetime, and moments that are over before we even have a chance to register them. And yet we try to package our time on this planet into minutes and hours and days and years...to define our lives in terms of precise, evenly spaced, measurable increments. What are we denying ourselves when we do that?
2. There is more to this universe than that which we can perceive with our 5 senses. There just is.
3. Being present in the moment can be hard. It's often difficult to set aside our history with a person or place, especially if it's a long one, and be truly open and receptive to the energy of now. We like to think we know stuff - when, in fact, that stuff we think we know might be horribly out of date. But the payoff when we can simply be in this moment far outweighs any effort we may feel to do so.
4. "You miss 100% of the shots you never take." - Wayne Gretzsky
5. There are times when you just need a jammie day. Have it. One day in pj's, eating popcorn for lunch and half-dozing your way through a Christopher Guest movie isn't going to hurt anybody, and it may just mean the difference between a sane you and a you that is completely shredded (by you, I mean me - maybe you don't care for Christopher Guest...I'll try not to judge).
1. You are not wrong! It seems our natural default mode -- I hear it too many times throughout the week -- something happens, and the reaction - "what's wrong with me?" Perhaps you have asked yourself that. The truth: Nothing! You are perfect!
2. It never hurts to ask! It's as simple as that, if you never ask, you never know.
3. Negotiate! Everything is negotiable. Go for it.
4. No more "I'm sorry!" I have found in life there are very few instances where I'm sorry is applicable (yes, I have kids, so this is a point of friction for me as every day someone does something to someone else and we have to apologize for hurt feelings...let's get beyond the daily sorry's when you are remembering how to operate as a social being with a body). Perhaps when you bump someone by accident, even then, a "Pardon me" or "Excuse me" works. Sometimes apologizing invalidates who we are. When you have to cancel plans, you make an honest mistake, you are simply being you, why do we feel compelled to couch those messages with an "I'm sorry"?
5. Don't look back! My daughter gave advice to a friend about learning how to ride a bike the other day -- her advice "Don't look back until you are really good at it." I took it as a metaphor for life. Often we look back and criticize ourselves that we didn't handle something well, why didn't we do things differently, etc. And for what? Trust you did the best you could in the moment. @@You can learn without criticizing yourself - and don't look back 'til you're really good at it.@@