Take care of yourself...blah, blah, blah...work you in your schedule....blah, blah, blah...self care is so important...blah, blah, blah...
Are we practicing our preaching? Taking our active meditation breaks? Listening to our bodies? Responding to our instincts? Trusting our gut feelings? Connecting to our truths?
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, of course I am doing all that stuff.
And it doesn't look anything like I planned.
Here's the scoop - I am getting ready for a big surgery. I've been putting it off for years, waiting for the perfect time (sound familiar to anyone?), putting up with chronic joint pain and a wonky gait and the 1,000 minor inconveniences that go along with hips that need replacing. The time has finally come, whether I'm "ready" or not, to take the plunge.
I scheduled the surgery 12 weeks out, allowing myself plenty of time to drop some excess weight, eat super healthy, get my core and arms ready to easily support me on crutches, and prepare a number of blog posts and things for Daring Spirits so that I wouldn't feel like I was slacking (totally my Virgo nature kicking in, believe me the rest of the DS team is gracious beyond grace). I also planned to make a bunch of meals for the freezer, deep clean the house, organize the 3 kids' wardrobes for the change of season, stock up on non-perishables & household supplies, and get a jump on Christmas shopping. All that on top of my regular daily demands and desires.
In short, I planned to be Superwoman on steroids. I planned as if I would be out of commission for I-don't-know-how-long (mostly because I didn't have a clear picture of what recovery would look like, and it's still a bit of a mystery). I planned to do all the things I would normally do ahead of time so that nobody would be inconvenienced and the machinery of my daily life would go on with nary a hiccup.
That was the perfect picture (just like we discussed on Facebook the other day). The reality looks very different.
The reality is, I have accomplished virtually none of those things, and it's not looking like many more tasks will get knocked off that list in the remaining week before I go get my shiny new hips. Turns out, what I really needed to do to prepare for this surgery was more internal than external, more spirit-led than body-led, more release than control.
It's a good thing I'm a Jedi-master meditator & a skilled medium (I say that with a great deal of amusement and eye-rolling, trust me: it was as much my skill as the wise counsel of my beloved fellow Daring Spirits). It's a good thing, because I got past the perfect picture and into the reality, beyond the to-do list and into the be-here-now list.
So, yes, I am taking care of myself - and I had to blow a lot of roses to do it the way my body, mind, and spirit need me to right now.
Short answer: yes. Long answer: I'm human and a work in progress. I have had a sore throat all week. Not a major sore throat, not a crazy can't talk sore throat, a minor, "hello remember me, I'm your throat" discomfort. I hadn't planned for this and where does it leave me? A bit frustrated because I'm not sure what I missed...
We all have our achilles heals, our kryptonite, the part of our bodies that remind us when we might need to do something or pay attention to something when we aren't. Perhaps it's a stomach ache or pain, a sore throat, or a gut feeling. It's your body communicating with you. When you listen, things go smoothly. When you don't, well, the ailment or situation may heighten.
So, where am I in my plans? Right there with you. Practicing, practicing, practicing, and adjusting as needed. I have taken extra time this week to tune into my body, to give it the extra TLC it is asking for be it in the form of food, rest, oils, active meditation, relaxing, and working out. Next step: planning more of the same - listening and practicing responding to what I hear.